yes. this really is about me.


hello. my name is stefan, and sometimes i make music.

i am a greek-american musician in my early 30s, and i reside in the lovely city of brotherly love and sisterly affection with my sweet cat, lilly.

this is my kitten, lilly.
she’s my little hellion and lifesaver.
she has a hard life consisting of naps, eating, and meowing.
her favorite other hobby is shoving her butt
in my face at inappropriate times.

i bought this domain some time in 2009, and it was originally a college side project to showcase some of work as a musician. i turned it into a blog sometime in 2013, but honestly didn’t do much with it. this is probably the 3rd or 4th remake of my site. (hooray for having bipolar disorder!)

the name comes from a lyric in the musical bare, which i had subbed in a performance of for one night. i instantly became hooked to this gay romeo & juliet, and especially this lyric, from near the end of the show. it is sung while one of the leads is dying after going to a priest for help because he wishes so badly to not be gay. the priest is of no help, and the character poisons himself during a production of romeo & juliet, and dies.

‘now i stand at a crossroads and stare at a question.
if prayer were the answer, i’d fall on my knees.
but forward is calling and i cannot stay here.’

i generally blog about my experience as someone living with mental illness and addiction. part of that journey is always trying to look forward, despite all the nonsense that tends to get in the way. and, believe me, it’s a lot of nonsense.

writing empowers me, although i rarely do so anymore. i hope to write more here.

by education, i am a musician. i have nearly half of my life as a woodwind player and have performed all over the world. i currently live in a city of “firsts” and have enjoyed my share of history, sometimes more than i care to admit.

the subtitle of my blog, this atheist could have used confessional, comes from a barenaked ladies song called best damn friend, written by frontman ed robertson. i am a “devout” atheist and consider myself a no-go-do-gooder. i also identify as a pacifist, i’m a card-carrying socialist. i also think in either greek or lyrics.

lastly, i am an openly-transgender man.

my experience as a former soprano with vocal training is something that i’ve been exploring in the year that i have been on testosterone. there are very few trans- singers being represented, and i hope to contribute to that as i learn to use my voice again now that it’s started to settle in to a more “me” range. i hope to return to school in the near future to pursue a career as a music therapist, and a huge part of that is learning how to use my constantly-changing voice.

philadelphia “free-mum” band.

this is one of my strange hobbies.

i sometimes dress up in ridiculous costumes and make music.
i guess i gotta use my degree for something.
this is how i started the year –
with the pfb/lgbt contingent of the greater overbrook string band.

trans- mums matter!

yea, i’m a part of a tradition that’s been historically not-nice to people like me… but i’ve always lived a selfless life. not even the fact that i am proudly transgender was going to stop me from being a part of something i’ve wanted to do ever since i taught myself how to play saxophone. no shame in that! FORWARD!

my mantra has always been “why be great at one instrument when you could be mediocre at several?”… and thus, i discovered musical theatre. that lovely world where the consensus is to avoid paying as many people as possible, so one reed player is expected to cover 42 instruments. because capitalism.
this one just happens to be the one i’m least mediocre at.

experience, contact, and all that fun nonsense.



  • over ten years in theatre as a woodwind doubler.
    • piccolo, flute, alto saxophone, clarinet. (condensed list of shows coming soon.)
  • graduate of west chester university of pa.
    • studied flute with dr. kimberly reighley, 2005-2009.
  • active in the philadelphia, south jersey, wilimington de, and lehigh valley.
  • piccolo player and woodwind co-section leader, philadelphia freedom band.
  • bass singer, philadelphia voices of pride
  • casual violin player and whatever else i could get my hands on.
  • several mummers parades on saxophone.
    (yay weird hobbies!)
  • proudly performed for president obama in 2013 on piccolo as part of the lesbian and gay band association.

other life things:

  • experience working with individuals with developmental disabilities.


email: stefan@forwardiscalling.com

facebook: https://www.facebook.com/s.i.hoimes

twitter: https://twitter.com/its_only_me

soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/s-hoimes